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From the
Hindenburg to the Fountainhead to Mr. Sweaty Bench,
these are more of the people that you meet when you're
lifting at the gym.
Continued from Part 1, you're
sure to recognize many, if not all, of these personalities from the gym.
1. Taking Up Space
If you've been to a gym
and watched somebody just kind of standing around looking lost, then you've
seen this type. They work their way slowly from one end of the gym to the other,
getting in the way and doing a few half-hearted dumbell curls every 10 minutes.
2. The Copycat
You can have some fun with
the Copycat. When you notice them watching what you're doing (because you know
they're going to copy you), do something extremely goofy and pretend that it
works incredibly well. Chances are, when you've moved on to your next exercise,
the Copycat is going to try it. Just like dueling banjos.
3. The Hindenburg
If you're having gastrointenstinal
difficulties, don't do squats (or sit-ups). That just doesn't work out well
for anybody. The humanity!
4. The Wannabe Powerlifter
Powerlifting is a tremendous
sport. Watching somebody who is trying to powerlift but doesn't know how and
is doing it all wrong can be tremendously funny. If you've ever watched somebody
cinch a belt up so tight they look like a wasp then do a knee-buckling quarter
squat with way too much weight, you know what I'm talking about.
5. The Pro
"There is only one
right way to do things and everything else everybody does is all wrong and I'm
the only who knows what they're doing and if you don't like it I'm going to
take my dumbells and go home."
6. The Ignorant Personal
Trainer
Every gym has them and I
don't have any idea how they slip through the cracks. They teach bad exercises
and poor form to unfortunate clients who just don't know any better. Then they
answer their cell phone while they're spotting!
7. Fountainhead
Stop hogging the water fountain
and let someone else have a turn! Fill up your water bottle at home - don't
stand there for five minutes while the trickle from the fountain slowly fills
your gallon jug. That goes double for backwashing into the fountain.
8. Mr. Sweaty Bench
If you sweat so much that
you slide off the back end a FLAT bench when you lie down, bring a towel, for
crying out loud! And please, please, PLEASE wipe it off when you're done. Don't
make me have to invent a standing bench press exercise.
9. The Inventor
Sometimes new exercises
or techniques work and sometimes they land you right on your head. The Inventor
will get back up and try again, sometimes performing the most incredibly effective
movements you've never seen. I know because I am an Inventor! But put together
a bad Inventor and a Copycat and you've got trouble!
10. The Houseguest
If you've ever seen someone
walk into the gym carrying a gym bag big enough to stash a body in and full
of so much stuff that they could live on an island for a month, you've seen
the Houseguest at work. Three hours later, when they leave the gym, they even
have the keys to lock up.
11. Rollin' Rollin' Rollin'
No need to carry that dumbell
to your bench, just roll it! After all, that's why they're round, right?
12. Beyond B.O.
It's not a crime to take
a shower. If a cloud follows you around like Pig Pen in the Charlie Brown comics,
you may want to look into that bathing thing.
You can read Part 1 of "Gym Personalities" at the following link:
Nick Nilsson is Vice-President
of the online personal training company BetterU, Inc. He has a degree in Physical
Education and Psychology and has been inventing new training techniques for
more than 16 years. Nick is the author of a number of bodybuilding eBooks including
"Metabolic Surge - Rapid Fat Loss," "The Best Exercises You've
Never Heard Of," "Gluteus to the Maximus - Build a Bigger Butt NOW!"
and "The Best Abdominal Exercises You've Never Heard Of" all available
at (http://www.fitness-ebooks.com).
He can be contacted at betteru@fitstep.com.
