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Bodybuilding
Supplements That Never Made It Past The Drawing Board
By Nick
Nilsson
Some supplements
are good. Some supplements are
amazingly good. These supplements aren't even close!
As a long-time trainer, I've tried a lot of bodybuilding supplements and I've
seen a lot of supplements come and go. Some have been good; some have been garbage.
Here's a few that never even came close...
1. The Protein Powder Keg - a 100 pound barrel of explosive protein (don't light
a match after ingesting). Contains over 100 megatons of power per keg.
2. Cheese Whiz Creatine
- if creatine is unstable in a liquid, surely it must be stable in a thick,
cheesy goo.
3. Saw Clamato - a Saw Palmetto
and Clamato juice knock-off. It doesn't do anything for your prostate but it
tastes really good when mixed with other supplements.
4. Sucker 2, The World's
Strongest Fat Burglar - burns the fat off your body while you sleep! Unfortunately,
you will never sleep again if you take it regularly.
5. DHEAHMBCLANO2WWECNN -
the latest innovation in shotgun supplementation. Fire it all in - something's
gotta work!
6. Ephedra-Free Ma Huang
- works best in combination with caffeine-free guarana and aspirin-free white
willow bark.
7. The Super-Complete Trainers
Multi-Vitamin - contains every single nutrient in optimal quantities for hard-training
athletes. Each pill weighs six pounds and must be held under the tongue for
3 hours. Also available in a gel-cap the size of your head.
8. High-Protein Kibbles
& Creatine Bits - Purina's first (and last) foray into the supplement industry.
9. Meal Replacement Bar
- instead of eating, you go to a tavern and get loaded.
10. Krazy-Glue-Cosamine
- seal up joint injuries permanently.
11. Vitamin C Biscuits -
a shameless marketing ploy by Hollywood to promote a film. Nothing but orange-flavored
horse manure.
12. CLBA - Conjugated Linoleic
Battery Acid - for use whenever you need a jump-start in your training.
13. Hydrogen Dioxide - this
chemical is currently under investigation by the International Olympic Committee
for its powerful performance-enhancing effects in the human body. Although it
is available in many fruity flavors, the generic version of H2O is by far the
most popular among athletes.
As you can see, supplementation can be confusing, but, if you're looking for
that extra boost in your training, stick with proven supplements such as protein,
creatine, glutamine and multi-vitamins (and plenty of hydrogen dioxide!) and
you can't go wrong.
------------------
Nick Nilsson is Vice-President
of the online personal training company BetterU, Inc. He has a degree in Physical
Education and Psychology and has been inventing new training techniques for
more than 16 years. Nick is the author of a number of bodybuilding eBooks including
"Metabolic Surge - Rapid Fat Loss," "The Best Exercises You've
Never Heard Of," "Gluteus to the Maximus - Build a Bigger Butt NOW!"
and "The Best Abdominal Exercises You've Never Heard Of" all available
at (http://hop.clickbank.net/?xxxxx/betteru).
He can be contacted at betteru@fitstep.com.
