Defective
Repetitions - Do Any of These Styles Describe
You?
The repetition or "rep" is the basis
of all training. So how can something so important
go so terribly (and humorously) wrong!
|
Think
back to the last time you were in the gym. Think about
who was in there, what they were doing and what they
were doing wrong. See how many of these defective rep
types you've spotted (hopefully, not in the mirror!).
1. The "Trampoline" Rep
What
goes down must bounce back up. The "Trampoline"
rep is most often found on the bench press (surprise).
Here's a hint - if your rib cage hurts more than your
pecs at the end of the set or if you have an indented
groove running across your chest so deep and straight
that you could pour water across your chest into a bottle
without spilling a drop, you may want to consider lightening
up the weight a touch. Leave the CPR to the professionals.
2.
The "I Can't Believe It's Not Styrofoam" Rep
This
style is commonly seen being done by anyone afraid that
if they lift anything heavier than a wet piece of paper,
they'll instantly develop massive, manly muscles (if
only it were that easy!). The key to this rep is removing
every bit of resistance that you can from the exercise.
The weight should appear to "float" as it's
being lifted. If any strain or effort is felt, stop
immediately before there is any danger of breaking a
sweat and consult your medical specialist.
3.
"The Spotter Made Me Do It" Rep
If
your spotter has to stretch out before your sets, that's
a big giveaway. If people pat your spotter on the back
and say "good set" to them when THEY get done
helping YOU, take note. If you have to yell encouragement
to your spotter instead of the other way around, you're
guilty. Do your body (and your spotter) a favor and
lift within your means.
4.
The "I Swear I Did This Weight Last Week"
Rep
This
failed rep is immediately followed by a shaking head
and a disbelieving stare at the weight. Watch for the
"somebody must have switched the numbers on these
weights because there's no way these are the same ones
I used last week" look in the eyes. The lifter
will never reduce the weight after this humiliation,
just go directly to a different exercise to try again.
5.
The "Funky Chicken" Rep
This
list would not be complete without a nod to the most
entertaining rep of them all: the "Funky Chicken
Rep." Let put it this way--if a bunch of sugar-crazed,
sock-footed kids scrambling for scattered Piniata-candy
on a freshly waxed floor looks more coordinated than
you when you're lifting...
6.
The "I Shouldn't Have Drank So Much Water"
Rep
Characterized
by a somewhat cross-legged stance and an urge to keep
the do-or-die rep (and hopefully everything else) in
you.
7.
The "Spitting Cobra" Rep
Deadly
accurate from great distances, the spitter will project
a wall of saliva onto a mirror 10 feet away. Don't walk
in front! You'll regret it (and need a shower)!
8.
The "Breathing Is For Suckers" Rep
"Who
needs to breathe properly. I can lift more weight when
I hold my breath." Perhaps, but you can also lift
more weight when you're CONSCIOUS.
9.
The "Half-A**ed" Rep
Doing
a rep in this fashion can leave a person dangerously
unbalanced. Use your whole a** and don't be a dumb a**.
10.
The "I'm Too Foxy For This Weight" Rep
Done
by a person spending more time watching their "form"
than watching their form. The person caught kissing
their bicep in the middle of a dumbell curl is a definite
culprit.
11.
The "We All Scream For Ice Cream" Rep
Sometimes
a good scream is just what you need to get that last
rep. But, sometimes it just isn't. If you find you need
constant attention from everyone else in the gym, just
wear a t-shirt that says "Kiss Me, I'm Irish"
or something like that. Screaming is fine when it's
merited. Screaming like your leg is caught in a bear
trap while you're doing wrist curls is not.
